Self-image and body image can be forever changed after a disabling accident or injury. These views of yourself can also be skewed if you have been disabled your entire life.
The Effects of Media
The modern media is partially to blame for much of the self-image problems in society today. To prove this theory, Harvard Medical School did a study of teenage girls in Fiji before and after the introduction of Western television shows such as Friends and Melrose Place. At the onset of the study, only 3% of Fijian girls reported an eating disorder. Three years later, in Harvard’s follow-up survey, the rate of eating disorders on the tiny island nation had risen to 15% and 74% of girls reported feeling “too big or fat” (Harvard Medical School, May 1999).
It’s not only girls that are affected by this onslaught of unhealthy body images. Boys and men also feel the pressure of “looking perfect.” There is another group that is affected by this imagery, as well – a group that is often overlooked by the mainstream media in their marketing campaigns, television shows and magazines.
That group is the disability community – men, women and children alike.
Self-Image & Self-Esteem in Children with Disabilities
The images we all see in the media are hard enough for a nondisabled teenager’s self-image to assimilate. Add a disability to the mix and it is almost impossible to live up to the unrealistic standards of beauty and perfection that the media tells us we must live up to in order to be accepted by society.
Children living with a disability often feel, whether consciously or unconsciously, somehow inadequate in a society that views any physical imperfection as a sign of unworthiness. These feelings can be seeded in a child’s mind with even the simplest of children’s stories. The Ugly Duckling is ostracized and put down because he does not look the same as the others. Physical differences such as gigantism or dwarfism are used as traits of evil in a person, a la Jack & the Beanstalk or Rumpelstiltskin. All of these things, no matter how innocent or unintentional, can plant the seeds of self-doubt that can grow over the years with a stranger’s casual remarks or the exclusion of almost any realistic portrayal of disability in the media.
There are very few positive portrayals of individuals with disabilities on television for disabled children to look up to. They may tune into the annual MDA telethon to look for a role model, but will learn that the children on the telethon are often portrayed as sad and pitiful. Even Ms. Wheelchair America, the pageant that promotes the accomplishments of women with disabilities over appearance, often looks like a “typical” beauty queen.
The best example of a person with a visible disability on television is Cerrie Burnell, host of a British kids' show. Burnell was born with one arm ending in a stump just below her elbow. While most parents want their children to see a good example like Cerrie, the station that airs the show has received a handful of letters from parents not wanting to let their children watch for fear that Cerrie will frighten them and give them nightmares. Others are afraid that seeing the host with one arm will pique their child’s curiosity and do not want to have that conversation yet.
Neither of these reasons will do much for a child’s self-esteem. They will get the basic message that people with disabilities can’t do certain jobs.
Help Build Self-Image & Self-Esteem
There are some things you can do to help build your child’s self-esteem.
Spend as much television-free time with your child as possible to try to counteract the effects of this onslaught of unhealthy images. Encourage your child to pursue what she is good at and to try new things. In every conversation about self-perception, emphasize that the disability is only a small part of who she is.
Above all, make sure that the child knows he is loved just the way he is.
Megan Abrams - I have lived with the effects of a childhood stroke for more than half my life and offer a uniquely personal perspective on disability.
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